10. This morning I had to defrost my computer
9. I spilled McDonald’s scalding hot coffee on my lap and liked it
8. The rats are climbing in bed with me to stay warm
7. Inmates are hugging me
6. The staff is wearing long underwear
5. In cafeteria, inmate hit on head with bowl of congealed jello dies
4. Drug dealers selling "nighttime, sniffling, sneezing, achy, stuffy head" crack
9. I spilled McDonald’s scalding hot coffee on my lap and liked it
8. The rats are climbing in bed with me to stay warm
7. Inmates are hugging me
6. The staff is wearing long underwear
5. In cafeteria, inmate hit on head with bowl of congealed jello dies
4. Drug dealers selling "nighttime, sniffling, sneezing, achy, stuffy head" crack
3. I can see my breath when I yell "Fuck you!"
2. My fingers are stuck to my keyboard
1. My ass is frozen shut
